The narcissistic pervert
The narcissistic manipulator or narcissistic pervert, famous for a few years as the charming seducer with grandiose ambitions. This personality knows no gender. Indeed, both men and women can have the narcissistic personality with the valence of manipulation. He/she fascinates as much as he/she terrorizes by his/her actions and shenanigans of an incredible precision and finesse. The stratagem is built under the objective to weave a spider’s web months before.
1. Everything was perfect, until one day…
The narcissistic manipulator or narcissistic pervert, famous for a few years as the charming seducer with grandiose ambitions. This personality knows no gender. Indeed, both men and women can have a narcissistic personality with the valence of manipulation. He/she fascinates as much as he/she terrorizes by his/her actions and shenanigans of an incredible precision and finesse. The strategy is built with the objective of weaving a spider’s web months before.
His favorite playground? Relationships.
This relationship is comparable to the quicksand in which his victims sink inexorably without realizing it.
And yet … Yet it was love at first sight.
It was a fairy tale at first. You never met anyone like him, like her. But that was before. Now the mask has fallen off and the relationship is like a roller coaster. You have this feeling of living with a sword of Damocles over your head.
Is it now that another explosion will emerge in him/her? You live in fear, incomprehension and apprehension of this guilt that you do not recognize, but that you carry without wanting it.
Your relationship has turned into a nightmare: emotional blackmail, threats, guilt, humiliation, lies, constant devaluation are part of your daily life.
As you have understood, there is nothing better than seduction to achieve his ends, because the more he knows how to reach your heart, the better he can control your mind. He/she is a dangerous strategist that he/she uses and abuses everything that can serve him/her without any limit. And when it is difficult to resist the call of your so-called soul mate, it is better to know quickly who you are dealing with.
2. General definition
The narcissistic pervert is a person who is characterized by his or her constant need for power and control over others, as well as by his or her manipulation and emotional exploitation of those around him or her. This personality can be encountered in all social and professional settings, and can have devastating consequences on the lives of its victims.
Narcissistic perverts do not care about their victims and only seek to use them for their own benefit. Tapping into the other to fill a void.
Let’s give some identifications:
- Narcissistic perverts often have a charming and charismatic appearance, which makes it easy for them to seduce their victims.
- They are also very skilled at manipulating others using their charm and ability to say exactly what their victims want to hear. This can include promises of support and financial security, as well as declarations of love and affection.
- They master the art of gaslighting
- However, once they have gained their victim’s trust, narcissistic perverts often begin to exert total control over their lives.
They may use control tactics such as:
- emotional manipulation: emotional blackmail and guilt,
- social isolation,
- moral harassment,
- verbal and physical violence
→ All of this in order to ensure that their victim remains under their control.
They can also be very critical of their victim; making them feel worthless and unable to do anything without their help. The grip tightens, without the victim seeing it. The Narcissistic Pervert takes bits and pieces of their victim, little by little. So small that the victim doesn’t realize it.
The consequences for the victims of a narcissistic pervert can be serious:
- They can experience a loss of self-esteem,
- and sleep disorders,
- they may also suffer significant financial losses,
- broken interpersonal relationships
- Deterioration of their physical and mental health.
Narcissistic perverts love their reflection in the love-filled eyes of the other.
3. Getting out of this relationship
In conclusion, the narcissistic pervert is a toxic personality that can have devastating consequences on the lives of its victims. It is important to understand the control tactics used by Narcissistic Perverts in order to better protect your own mental and physical health. If you think you are being victimized by a Narcissistic Pervert, it is important to seek professional help. You can contact a therapist for help and support in leaving this toxic relationship.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapies (CBT)
Cognitive-Behavioral Therapies allow you to learn to study your emotions, and to take some distance from the events and what you may be feeling at that moment. A work on automatic thoughts, on false beliefs, on mental representations and on the interpretation of the world can be done.
In addition, Cognitive Behavioral Therapies will also be able to work on the different emotional blocks that will lead you to feel stuck in this way, in this relationship. To do this, Virtual Reality Exposure Therapies immerse the patient in an environment that can generate intense emotions and help them work on their emotions, their history and their thoughts. It is therefore important to develop this emotional intelligence through relaxation, for example. Understanding and distinguishing one’s physical sensations in order to better deal with them is particularly useful. These relaxation sessions can be done with videos or audio that you can find on the internet, but also in virtual reality. Virtual reality allows a better learning of this relaxation for people who are less adept at these techniques.
EMDR and Ericksonian hypnosis are also interesting therapies in order to accept the sensations that you feel in the present moment and to go towards the road of change that will be the most beneficial for you.
However, here is a 28-question questionnaire that can help identify some of the behavioral characteristics that are commonly associated with narcissistic perverts, whether it be in a professional, romantic, family or friendship setting: